Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Plus Size and Beautiful



I am a plus size girl, I have always been fat and I will always be fat. As I continue with this please note that I say Fat Girl with respect love and a degree of attraction, since I do like my woman with meat on their bones. If you do not like what I have to say please move along I have no tolerance for anyone who is going to name call or be nasty here. If you have actual facts and a legitimate argument then by all means I want to hear it.


I am okay with being a big girl. However I have found myself upset with my current weight, I don’t mind being big, but I do mind being this big.

It’s kind of hard to lose weight when I love food and hate exercise, I am sure many of my plus size friends and readers will agree with me here. I like to eat, I find texture, flavor and the experience of food something amazing, a gift other animals do not quite get. I enjoy how social food is, cooking, baking, eating out…It does not matter, I enjoy it all. It’s hard to say no to your favorite bread, a good eight ounce steak or a loaded baked potato when you know you should really have the salad.



I know to eat healthy, but honestly eating healthy is expensive, I am a single mom on a limited income, buying healthy food breaks the bank. I buy groceries two weeks at a time and most fruits and veggies do not last that long. My kids are thin, they eat healthy, or as healthy as I can afford to, no candy, no soda, no junk…Unless it’s a special occasion. I on the other hand struggle with my weight. I have always struggled with my weight.



I am a beautiful woman, I dress myself well, I am rarely without male or female companionship. Not because I am a whore with low self esteem but because I have a great personality, a pretty smile and am fairly self confident. The longest time I was single was ages 15-17 and then from 2003- 2005 after I had my first daughter. A lot of my current weight issues comes from having my first daughter and not losing the weight.


No matter what any one says, being a big girl does not stop you from having relationships, finding sex fun and being considered sexy. Many people think guys don’t want a big girl, but it’s just not true. Men are not as shallow as main stream media like us to believe. Granted there are chubby chasers and most plus size girls with good self esteem know to stay away from that kind of player. In fact it as been my experience skinny guys tend to like us curvy. Lol Now are there shallow men and women who only want what magazines tell us is beautiful? Sure, but screw those ass holes.


In the past being larger meant you were rich enough to afford food, healthy enough to have babies and up until the creation of Twiggy considered sexy. Elizabeth Taylor, Mae West and Marilyn Monroe are all considered BBW. Marilyn Monroe was a size 12/14.


I did Weight Watchers before my first daughter was born and did really well on it…I have tried four times in the last three years to do Weight Watchers again and it just doesn’t work, if anything is makes me want to eat more.


I have tried Slim Fast, Special K, calorie counting, a ton of different fad diets, Curves for Women and just fasting. These never work, they make everything worse.


I am bulimic, how you may ask, can you be a fat girl and still bulimic? It is easy. If I over indulge even the slightest I feel so badly that I purge…It’s been on going for a few years and a cycle that is hard to break. It is very much that I like to eat but feel bad for doing so. I have wanted to try to attend Over Eaters Anonymous, but either don’t have the time or scare myself out of it.


I have thought about weight loss surgery, but don’t have the funds or the credit to do it, I would also have to take a ton of time off work…. And about a dozen more excuses.

“But why don’t you just eat right and exercise?” I can hear you asking me. Well I try to eat right, decent portion sizes, not a ton of processed junk…I basically forgo soda in favor of ice tea and water. And exercise? I do so when I can, I would love to have the freedom and ability to work out four times a week, but with work, school and my kids that is almost impossible to do unless I work out at home.

There is the rub…I am a tad lazy. I get home with my kids by 6 have dinner, deal with homework and my daughters needing attention and BAM it’s suddenly eight and they are going to bed, I have homework of my own to finish and then I want the comfort of my bed.

My boy and I try and walk as much as we can when we are together and we try and hit the gym once or twice a week together, so that’s a start….I know it’s not enough though. So I bought a Wii…. Here is where my activity level will begin to increase. I got Just Dance and Wii Sports, not only are they fun but they get me off my ass and allow me to be active while spending time with my daughters. Hopefully I will see a change in myself that I will enjoy.

I also bought some Ephedra, I know, I know it’s FDA banned and if not used properly can be dangerous. However back in the early 2000’s when it was in Metabolife I used it and it worked really great. Gave me energy and killed my appetite. So I figured, why not try to again. I did the green tea and raspberry ketoenes with no success. Today is my second day taking it and I already have noticed my extra energy and my lack of appetite.

I won’t be this fat when I get re married

I love myself, do not think I don’t. I enjoy how I look I just need to drop about fifty pounds and get back to where I was in high school.

I am pro fat girls! YAY Plus size! Skinny skinny is over rated and I do not think plus size women should be shamed into losing weight because society’s idea of beauty if stick thin. Health wise it is a good option to lose weight, but really it is all about YOU, how YOU feel and not what anyone else thinks, says or feels.

Be plus size and proud, being proud of how you look isn’t about hiding the fact you are really miserable, it is about actually being happy with yourself. It is about the fact that everyone is different and you should OWN your differences. Just OWN it in a healthy way. You can be plus size and still be healthy.


Fat Girl Resources:

Clothing:

Lane Bryant
Torrid
Dream Diva

Blogs:

My Happy Fat
Fat Chicks Rule
Fat Girls Rule
Confessions of a Fat Girl
The Fat Girl Blog


Plus size famous women


Melissa McCarthy


Kathy Bates


Adele


Delta Burke




Ann Wilson



Camryn Manheim


Roseann Barr


Carnie Wilson



2 comments:

  1. I really love your post!I think building positive opinions of ourselves is really important to us and to the legacy we leave behind. I like your view on things and at the time I am looking for more ya books that feature plus sized girls because I think that there's a lack of "normal" looking girls in books.

    I for one am not plus sized but i can relate to the struggle of being plus sized since people tend to treat plus sized people as minorities. Being judged by your outside appearance sucks so it makes it all the more challenging to be happy in your own skin.

    There's a book i just got by Cyn balog called Starstruck and it's about a plus sized girl who learns to be happy with herself and gets the guy without having to change who she is.

    I wish you good luck on your blog and i found you on a goodreads thread.Signed up for your updates and look forward to your posts!

    http://guinandlibertadtomas.blogspot.com/

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    1. Glad you enjoyed the post. Thanks for commenting and reading !

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