Friday, December 7, 2012

How not to become a victim of a serial killer

As anyone can tell you I have a HUGE interest in serial killers. I have since I was little. Pretty much if it’s serial killer related then I like it. Though I am a little snobby, it can’t just be ANY serial killer. There needs to be something unique. For example the ones that fascinate me at any time or place are ; Jack the Ripper, Elizabeth Bathory, Ted Bundy, and H.H. Holmes.

I also enjoy any tale that has murder in it with off twists. I like a good Angel of Mercy or Poisoned story (especially crazy women who poison like twelve husbands), cults that commit mass suicide and the occasional mass murderer. (Hello, grew up in California, Manson is creepy AND interesting.)

With all the morbid and macabre facts, stories, trivia and crap floating around my head today’s blog is a humorous one. Renee’s Top Ten Ways NOT to Become a Victim of a Serial Killer.

Now, these are my personal little tidbits and rules. They are NOT 100% effective because lets face it… Humans are deranged and sometimes fall outside the patterns and confinements that we set up. There is always a loop hole or an exception.

1) Have a penis. Or do not have a vagina – Yeah this one is kind of hard to change, but statistically speaking most serial killers prey on women. 91 % of serial killers are male

2) Do not be white- Yeah again, hard to do anything about. But serial killers like to kill usually within their own ethnic race and by 2010 52% of all serial killers were white.

3) Do not live in the United States- Yes I know here is a pattern. This is also hard to change if you already live in the U.S, but compared to other countries our serial killer rate is ridiculous.

4) Do not be a cheap easy tart- Okay, that sounds mean and is not always accurate. But most serial killers pray on prostitutes and other sex type workers like consorts and strippers. This is also a good horror movie rule too.

5) Do not be a virgin- yeah ok so now you have to find a nice balance between innocent and harlotville… But serial killers also like young innocent people too. Elizabeth Bathory killed over 600 virgins and bathed in their blood.

6) Do not isolate yourself- this means no walking around by yourself, especially at night and especially in places where no one is around. And if you HAVE to, keep yourself alert and possibly armed.

7) The Three S’s: Don’t talk to strangers, don’t get in vehicles with strangers and don’t take anything from strangers- Yes your mother was right.

8) Do not give out personal information online and if you are doing the online dating thing use common sense, well known sites, public places and BE CAREFUL.

9) Be overweight - yeah well not the HEALTHIEST option. But serial killers tend to like skinny victims because they have to haul around your dead weight.

10) Educate yourself- so know what a predator looks like and use common sense and sound judgment. Read and do not bury your head in the sand. If it seems too good to be true then it is. If your inner warning bells go off, listen to them.

So, yeah those are the top ten. Now here are five basic guidelines just to make sure you don’t wind up in any other horrible scenarios.

A) Do not join a cult or become a religious zealot.

B) If someone other than your normal nurse or doctor tries to medicate you ask questions first.

C) See a therapist if you have thoughts of suicide, depression or murder

D) If someone you know has more than one person in their life die from something questionable do not take food or drink from them.

E) Do not become homeless or run away from home. It makes you an easy target.

So hopefully this amused you and maybe gave you some things to think about. Have a great weekend.

Monday, December 3, 2012

Anti Bullying

Did you ever have those people in your life that if you drove by them and they were bleeding you would smile, flip them off and keep driving? I do, in fact there are a number of people, my ex best friend, my ex husband and above all… About three or four girls who bullied me all the time from third to sixth grade. And then tried to from seventh to 12th, but I had gotten the reputation for being kind of a bitch so they backed off. And hopefully, picking on me had lost some appeal and they went, grew up and got lives of their own.

Now a days the schools are filled to the brim with anti bullying propaganda and I say “HERE! HERE!” Because I was bullied and no one really gave a shit. The attitude was more ignored and for me to just suck it up. Elementary school was hell for me. I was over weight, poor, from a divorced family, wore ugly clothes and had short bushy curly hair. Sure I was kind, funny, creative, sweet and nice, but those traits didn’t matter. Even girls I considered friends would betray me or ignore my pain if it meant that they got to hang with the “cool” crowd or not be picked on themselves. Even from the start I knew I didn’t want to be a “popular” girl. They were mean, right? Or at least most of the ones I knew were.

My sixth grade year I went home sick once a week because the tormenting was so bad I just wanted to be left alone. The friends I did have got bullied almost as badly as I did. I had bathrooms doors kicked in on me, names called, secrets sold to be spread around campus. I was tricked, pushed, whispered about and openly laughed at. I was that girl, the one who is thinking, “I wish you would all go and die now.” When I stood up for myself these same bitches and douche bags would be the first to run and tattle, landing me in trouble, simply for sticking up for myself.

I felt alone and sad… I hated school and everything to do with it. I was so excited to start middle school and leave behind all the people who had teased me. My middle school was pretty large and while sure, a lot of the same assholes went there, there were so many new people that I made friends quickly. I became loud, crass, funny and caring. Most of my new friends were in awe by my language and the fact that I seemed so grown up. But those same nasty harlots who had made me miserable would creep up every once in a while to say something horrible. I was always like, “do you SERIOUSLY not have anything better to do?” I learned to ignore them and surround myself with girls meaner than they could EVER possibly be.

High school was amazing. I made a TON of friends and was the center of my tiny social group. I was never popular but I think most people at least knew who I was. Aside from maybe one or two comments no one EVER picked on me again. I made friends with a couple of popular people (you know…the ones who will talk to you in private but not in front of their friends) and the rest left me alone. Thankfully several of the twat waffles that had been so cruel to me went to the other high school.

I did find parts of my personality changed because of my experience. I, in turn, am meaner, harsher, more closed off and more prone to tease others. I try to do it in jest; I never want to hurt anyone’s feelings. But the past effects us all and those who are bullied a lot of the time grow strong personal defenses which include becoming cruel in our own way. When gossip is fed so often through everyone’s words it is hard to get away from it and stop the cycles. Is gossip good or bad? I think it is like magic neither good or bad, it is the intent that colors whether your teasing or gossiping is right or wrong.

Now as a mother a girls I am super alert to bullying. My daughter has a bully in her class at school, already, and she is only in third grade. This girl has picked on and pushed my daughter, left bruises and threatened to “steal” her friends. When it started in first grade I took care of business. Like a proud and angry Mama bear I had a meeting with the principle and the teacher and made sure this girl was watched and that she sat no where near mine. Last year when she bruised my daughter I called and dealt with the school counselor and the principle, gave them a copy of the picture I took and told them they better take care of it or I would. This year my daughter has been pretty much left alone by this little she-bully. Hopefully this She-Bully has grown up a little or her parents have enforced a stricter social behavioral code. My child has been TAUGHT that being mean to others is wrong. I have explained that I have a zero tolerance for her teasing and being mean to other children.

I wonder about parents of children who become bullies. Are they themselves assholes? Or do they not pay attention and just not care? People need to pay attention. Bullying is a severe problem which leads to kids killing other kids or growing up and being the kind of adults you warn your children about. Or children grow up with other issues like low self esteem. Really alert your children to the types of bullying, physical, verbal, and cyber. Explain to them what to do if they are being teased and that teasing is wrong.

The statistics are horrifying.

One out of seven children are victims of bullying (is one yours?)

More than half of all children witness someone being bullied.

Almost twenty percent of kids skip school to prevent being bullied.

One out of ten students will simply drop out of school because of teasing.

Suicide is the third leading case of death in kids ages 12-18 and gets higher every year. Of these kids more than half were being bullied.

Bullying leads to anxiety, depression, low self esteem, low assertiveness and aggressiveness.

If this isn’t chilling enough:

Tyler Clementi killed himself in 2010 after teasing; Greg Cardarelli in 2004 and Rachel Ehmke in 2012. Phoebe Prince was 15 when she killed herself for the same reason, as did Amanda Cummings in 2012. These are just some of the ones who made the news. Don’t let your child be next.

Anti- Bullying

Websites to Look at:

Information on Bullying and How to Stop it

Statistics of Bullying